I’m sure I’m not the only one who sometimes feels pressure, from my own inner critic or others, to tell a certain story—a story that is funnier, more serious, more literary, more creative—I could go on and on. Something more commercial or just plain different than what I’ve written or am trying to write. We sit with ideas for days, months, and years wondering if they are the ones we should explore, shape, and share. Hoping they are worth the time it will take to make them into something.
But how do we ever know if we are picking the right one?
Honestly, I’m not sure we ever truly do. That is, until we actually begin (and even then, I’m still not so sure). I was listening to an interview with adult author Marlon James, where he spoke about how he often “pick[s] the wrong seed.” Where it has sometimes taken him between sixty to five hundred pages to figure out that a storyline or character needed to be left in a bin of ideas. That the right “seed” hadn’t been planted. While the radio host seemed shocked to hear this, I wasn’t surprised at all. I’ve been there. At times, it has taken writing a whole novel to know it isn’t right, that it’s not the story I’m meant to tell or the journey my characters are meant to travel.
This isn’t to say I can’t get there, or that the project should be abandoned, it just means it’s going to take a lot more work. Even then it doesn’t ensure others will agree it’s a worthwhile story to pursue. So I’ve had to find ways to quiet my own doubts, and uncertainties and believe in the story, characters, or moments that have captured my attention and heart. That they are worth figuring out. So now I try and pick projects that mirror seeds I hold dear. Whether it is the things that make me curious, the experiences I grew up loving, or wanting to see, hear, and read or a moment I just wish to uncover or understand. These seeds speak to family, friendship, possibilities, discovery or so many other things. But for me, these are the ideas worth planting.
Part of the wonder of writing is the wonder itself, the journey of exploration to find the story that is inside us, built on our hopes, wishes, and experiences. Those are the stories I’m okay with writing extra pages to figure out. While I hope it won’t take me too long to find my way into any stories, these are the projects that are worth the challenge. They are the ideas I will stand by, that speak to me, whether they are the stories my inner critic or others think I should write or not. These will be the stories that I am proud of, the stories that have a little piece of me. These are the stories I’ll hold dear.
What are the stories and ideas you will write extra pages for?
Leah Henderson is the author of the middle grade novels The Magic in Changing Your Stars, a 2021 Golden Kite Finalist and One Shadow on the Wall. Her picture books include Daddy Speaks Love, A Day For Rememberin’ and Together We March, a 2022 Golden Kite Finalist. When Leah isn’t writing or teaching, she is traveling in search of discovery, stories, and understanding.
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