Hola, hello, howdy!
Much like writing, caregiving can be a very isolating experience… but it does not have to be a lonely one. The whole “it takes a village to raise a child” thing is equally true of any piece of art and of an artist themselves, especially when caregiving is involved. In this week’s post I’ll dive deep into ways you can weave your creative practice into your life through the support of those around you, even the very people you’re caring for.
In my first Creating while Caregiving post, I highlighted the grandmother in LEAVE ME ALONE, whose drive to finish her knitting leads on an epic quest for some peace and quiet. Like Brosgol’s determined MC, a desire to create can compel you to the most extreme circumstances (especially if you’re on deadline). The urge to isolate is real, but, for most people, it is not sustainable. Sure, you can escape to a DIY writing retreat or conference for a bit, but eventually, you have to exit the wormhole.
Here are three things that have helped me build and grow my community while also caregiving. Obviously, everyone’s life and needs look different, so I’d love to hear what has worked for you!
Be someone else’s cheerleader:
Cheering on others online is an easy and accessible way to become involved in an existing creative community.
 |
| Celebrating the successes of fellow creators from the comfort of my sofa. |
- Engage on social media: Being intentional about what you comment helps show you're engaging with their work in a meaningful way. This takes more energy but will go much further than likes and reposts. Same goes for replying to newsletters.
- Be a community helper: Discords, Facebook groups and other online communities offer the networking and community building of in-person events without any of the travel or expense that make in-person meetups logistically complicated for many caregivers. Sharing pertinent industry news, classes, posing interesting questions, and generally adding to a supportive vibe is a great way to build community online. Keep self-promo to a minimum.
Get buy in from your people:
The creative process is a collaborative one and giving people in your life the chance to be supportive of you is a great way to get their buy-in. Non-toxic family, co-workers and friends can all play a role in your creative journey. Of course, you will get unsolicited advice, so feel free to train the people who matter to provide you with the support you want and need.
Your significant other:
Calibrate depending on your love language and their strong suits. Acts of service? They can do the Saturday chores so you can have the afternoon to read. Receiving gifts? Keep a running list of classes, books and supplies that will help your craft. You get the idea!
 |
| Cut paper artist Cynthia de la Torre shared photos of a party her family threw. It was themed after book she wrote as a child. Your people will keep you going even when impostor syndrome kicks in |
Your children/dependents/students:
Babies and infants
are an infinite source of ideas - just be sure to write them down! As
kids grow older, be explicit about your role as an artist or writer and
how they can be a part of your team. Ask for their ideas and listen
enthusiastically. Be the artist parent or the author auntie that always
wants to know what kids are reading, watching, creating. Be sure to
promise you will credit children for any ideas you use.
Parents/elder dependents:
Obviously,
the grown ups in your life will provide a different source of
inspiration and support. Avid-readers can help you stay current even
when you have no time to read. They can also make for great
beta-readers. Older adults get a bad rap for yelling at clouds, but they
are your source of deep knowledge, crazy stories, and valuable life
lessons. Paid services like Storyworth allow you to easily interview
loved ones via email, though connecting could be as simple as a weekly
scheduled phone call.
Double duty bonus: If you are burnt
out on your own elder dependents, find a friend with interesting
parents to swap phone check-in duties with once in a while.
 |
| My sprinting buddy, author Rosario Martinez, is one of the pillars of my creative village. |
Get a Sprinting Buddy:
This pairs the concept of working in short focused spurts with simple accountability via text message. I have been sprinting with author Rosario Martinez for the last seven years and as you can see in our text messages above, we keep it simple!
- Find a buddy with a similar work/life schedule and desire to sprinkle quick bursts of creativity into their day. Ask around your friend group, online forums, and your SCBWI regional meetings.
- Agree upon your sprint signal. I alternate between a running emoji and a Forrest Gump gif.
- Agree upon a default sprint amount (can be 5-10 mins or 20-30 minutes…see what is doable for you).
- When a window of free time arises, send your buddy a sprinting request! Allow 1-2 minutes for a response or just set your timer and dive in.
- SPRINT! Eliminate or hide from all distractions and prepare to focus on one creative task. This should be something you can quickly dive into, like sketching or continuous writing. It can help to choose what you will be focusing on ahead of time.
- Beep beep beep! When your timer rings you can either check in with your sprinting buddy or, if you’re feeling inspired and have more time, start the timer and sprint again.
Double duty bonus: Is there someone in your life you need to check in with but don’t have much to talk about? Asking that kooky great-aunt or arty but quiet niece to be your sprint buddy is a low stakes way to maintain or grow a connection while feeding your own creative practice.
Scheduled sprints might work better for some sprinting buddies. Online programs like Focusmate and a plethora of accountability apps offer the accountability of a sprinting buddy with relative anonymity and less set up “friction.”
Be persistent!
Much like finding a good therapist, spouse, or mechanic, it can take time and some false starts to grow your creative community. Critique groups fizzle, writing partners have to take breaks to care for their actual partners, life happens. Don’t get discouraged! Keep reaching out and don’t take cancellations or ghostings too personally - instead keep searching and you will find someone whose creative energy and commitments compliments your own.
How have you managed to integrate your community into your creative practice? I’d love to hear about it!
bye, adios, chau-chowdy!
Romy Natalia Goldberg is a Paraguayan American writer and artist with a love for stories about culture and communication. She has lived throughout the Americas, including in Argentina, where most of her family is from. Her debut picture book, THE GOOD NIGHT SHIFT, is an ode to the people, especially caregivers, who help keep our communities running at night. Illustrated by Isabel Roxas, it will be published by Scholastic/Orchard Press in April, 2027 with a forthcoming Spanish translation.
Shout out the night shift heroes in your life at www.romynatalia.com/the-good-night-shift
- Read the first post in the Creating while Caregiving series: Picture books that Help Caregivers Feel Seen!
- Próximamente, este artículo estará disponible en español en La Cometa.
